Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve posted on this subject.  I’m not sure why, exactly, but maybe it’s because I just didn’t feel like dealing with it.  Aloud.  For all to hear read.  Until now, I guess…

Since I last left you, not a whole lot has changed for me (in terms of hormones).  I still have not gotten a period since the end of July, but it appears some of my crucial hormone levels are beginning to increase (namely DHEA and progesterone).  My ob/gyn suggested starting an aggressive 6-month round of fertility meds and I just wasn’t quite ready to do it.  With both of us finishing up school and Colin not yet having a job, we decided to delay this process until the Fall.  If we have to go that route, so be it, but I would really like to give my body a chance to regulate things on its own.  It may be wishful thinking, but I’m okay with that…I’m an eternal optimist 😉

When we made the decision to wait, I felt like a HUGE weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.  I talked with my local ND who referred me to a specialist on female hormones.  He reviewed all my lab work and ordered a few new tests.  I’m following his recommendations based on the results, so we shall see.  I’ll keep you posted, for sure.

To date, I’m about 7 pounds over my maintainable “skinny jeans” weight, but I’m actually feeling really comfortable with it.  Sure, I’ve been substantially leaner in my life, but I can still do everything that I want to do.  That’s what matters to me!

With my doctor’s okay, I’ve ramped my workouts back up a bit, making sure I’m taking rest when I need it and trying to do less than 1-hour of strenuous activity a day.  He also recommended I workout only in the morning, because my test results indicated certain levels of hormones are elevated from noon-bedtime.  Interesting, right?

I think the hardest part for me right now is that everyone in my world is popping up pregnant.  Most days I feel nothing but happiness for them, but every once-in-a-while I get a pang of jealousy and frustration and panic and sadness and fear.  So I cry.  And then I take a deep breath and remind myself that eventually our day will come too.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Julie January 12, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Natalie, I can’t imagine how tough this is to write, let alone think about. You are so brave, and you’re right, your time will come. I’m sending every best thought.


Sarah January 12, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Oh, Natalie, I am so sorry. I know how that feels. My heart aches for you, but know that your time will come. And at the right time. I am hear if you need to talk – or have someone to cry with! 😉 Love you!


Katie January 13, 2012 at 8:06 pm

Honey, you are so amazing! I am sending lots of hugs and good vibes out into the Universe for you right now. I hope they reach you.

And you are going to be such an awesome mother, whenever that may be!

I am also very pleased to hear that even though you are not as lean as you have been in life, you are comfy in your skin and with your body.


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