1.24.2013

Wow, it’s been a while since I posted on this page.  I’m not sure exactly where to begin, so I’ll just start typing…

I wish I could tell you that I had tremendous success in working with both my ND and OB/GYN last year.  That it took little intervention, my cycles regulated, and it was an effortless process.  I wish I could tell you that I found something that worked for me.  Most of all, I wish I could tell you that we were expecting.

Since I last wrote, three of my closest friends had babies.  Three amazing women with whom I talk almost daily.  And while I feel nothing but love and joy for them, I can’t help but think “why is it so easy for them and so hard for me”.  It’s remarkable how similar I am to all three of them in many ways, especially with food, exercise, and our type-A personalities.  However, in this one area, there is clearly a big difference.  I’m not exactly sure what it is, nor do I think I’ll ever know.  And that’s really hard for me.

But it seems that the harder I try to search for answers, the harder I try to understand what may be going on in my body, and the more I compare myself to my friends and other women around me, the more sad and frustrated and overwhelmed I feel.  While I know that letting go would be the most helpful in my situation, this is way easier said than done for me.

Right now I feel pretty good about my treatment plan (which I will expand on soon) and am encouraged that everything will work out in due time.

So, for now, I’ll just keep on putting one foot in front of the other.  Because really, what else can you do?

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Tracey English January 25, 2013 at 11:07 am

I wish I had words of wisdom. Just sending virtual hugs and prayers. xoxo

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Amy carrillo February 21, 2013 at 8:53 pm

Thinking of you, sending lots of love, hugs, and optimism!

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